Melissa Koning, BSN, RN, CPPD, CLEC
Doula FAQ's
Every doula is a little different. We have different philosophies and styles and personalities. Here's where you can learn a little bit about me- who I am as a doula and as a person.
Finding the right doula is a matter of fit. Your experience depends on how comfortable you are with the person coming into your home, especially during such a dynamic and often vulnerable period of your life. If I could offer you one piece of advice it would be to interview with multiple doulas before deciding on "the one."
Working Together
Q: What can we expect from doula support? A: When you work with me, you can expect a well-rested, calm, and friendly caregiver to arrive on time and ready to check in. You can expect me to listen to your concerns, preferences, and values. You can expect your questions to be answered thoughtfully and nonjudgmentally. You can expect me to present information and ideas to you while empowering you to decide what's best for yourself and your baby. And you can expect me to prioritize your wellbeing and your relationship with your baby.
Q: What would a normal night look like? A: This can vary based on your needs, your feeding methods, and your baby's age. Generally, we start by checking in about how the day went, chat about any questions you may have, and make a plan for the night. I encourage you to take advantage of the time I'm there and sleep as much as you can. While you sleep, I care for the baby, bringing them to you for feedings or bottle feeding them depending on your preferences. While you and your baby sleep, I take care of tasks like baby laundry, restocking changing stations, or sanitizing feeding supplies. When it's time for me to leave, I will hand off baby duty to you- ideally by quietly bringing the sleepy baby (or baby monitor) in to your room and allowing you to continue your slumber.
Q: Do you promote specific parenting strategies? A: In short- no. Parenting is personal, emotional, and cultural, and you are the authority on parenting your baby. I offer resources, suggestions, and up to date evidence based practices but leave the decision making in your hands. When you are asleep, I use my best judgement based on my experience and my understanding of your preferences. We are a team an t the line of communication is always open.
Q: How will I know what's happening with my baby while I sleep? A: I keep a running log of notes so you are always in the loop. If you use a baby tracking app, I'm happy to keep it updated.
Q: What if I feel nervous about someone else caring for my baby? A: It's normal to feel a little nervous, especially on the first night. You are always welcome to come in and say hello, text for an update, or peek in on the baby monitor at any time. If you feel more comfortable, your baby can even sleep near you. Most parents feel at ease by the second night.
Good to know
Q: What areas do you serve? A: I live in El Cerrito and travel to most parts of the East Bay, San Francisco, and Marin, but please check with me to see if I serve your area.
Q: How far in advance should we book? A: Most people book during the second trimester in order to ensure the best availability, but sometimes I'm available on shorter notice. It's always worth asking.
Q: Do we need to provide you with anything while you're in our home? A: For the most part, no. I come prepared with everything I need to take care of myself. The only thing I need from you is a comfy place to sit with the baby and possibly access to a baby monitor.
Q: Do you sleep during the night? A: Not usually, especially when your baby is still very young. Once they start sleeping longer stretches I may nap, but I don't count on those naps to meet my sleep needs. I get a full 8 hours at home after I leave so I can be fully refreshed when I see you next.
Q: Do you work in homes with pets? A: Yes! I love animals and I would love to befriend yours.
Q: Do you work with twins? A: Yes!
Learn about Melissa
Q: Why do you like being a doula? A: What's not to love? I literally hold babies for a living. I also really enjoy meeting so many new families and being introduced to different customs and cultures.
Q: Who are you outside of work? A: I'm an introvert who likes trying new recipes, knitting cozy things, and being outdoors. I also have two kids (now teens!) and the most amazing wife.
Q: Aren't you a nurse? Why are you working as a doula? A: Because I like to! Also, I'm a recent graduate and finding a nursing job takes a while. But I don't know that I'll ever REALLY be done doula-ing.
Q: Do you keep in touch with the families you work with? A: Sometimes! I love getting updates and pictures as babies grow into kids.
Q: What is your best advice for new parents? A: Being a parent isn't about doing everything right. Be responsive, try new things, have a good laugh, and learn to apologize.
